Supporting Your Spouse Through Hard Times (Part 3: Your Prayers)
Supporting Your Spouse Through Hard Times (Part 3: Your Prayers)
By Bradley Bennett
A friend once told me, “The surest sign of your love for someone is whether you pray for them.”
This is true in seasons where we are in a regular rhythm, but it becomes magnified in seasons where your spouse is going through a hard time.
Prayer is the most powerful weapon we have to combat difficult situations in their life, so if we love them, then why wouldn’t we want to wield it as often as possible?
When you use prayer in these types of situations you are actually partnering with your spouse to invite God into their situation. You are opening the door for Him to move in miraculous ways.
It’s among one of the most loving things you can do.
Your Prayers Have An Impact
When you pray to God, he hears you. There are many scriptures that show the impact that our prayer life can have, but we must believe it ourselves. Earnest, strong prayer is what will move the needle for your spouse in a hard time, but you can only offer those types of prayers when you believe they will have an impact.
“Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.” ~ James 5:16
“And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us.” ~ 1 John 5:15
When I was younger in my faith, I saw prayer as an opportunity for a quick nap. My prayer life was nearly non-existent because I didn’t see the power and value in it.
It wasn’t until I started to whole-heartedly believe that my prayers had an impact that I began to notice things shift. Once I began putting faith behind my prayers, it became an opportunity to invite God to show up and work miracles.
If you are ready to pray for your spouse earnestly, here are a few practical ways I’ve found to do it well…
Pray For Their Heart
I’m not talking about your spouse’s physical beating heart, but rather their overall softness towards God, his people, and your marriage. Pray that they would continue to be receptive to God’s love in the middle of their season.
One thing we must always be vigilant against is a hardening of the heart. When this happens, it can potentially stop God’s movement in a situation and can an impact on your marriage.
Cover your spouse in prayer, asking that their heart will be filled with the joy, love, and peace of Christ. Ask that God would give them an extra portion and protect the tenderness they have towards his voice.
Pray For Their Mind
In tough seasons the mind can often become a battleground of conflicting thoughts. Lies can enter and try to convince your spouse that they are not good enough or are a failure. What they need is the wisdom and discernment to battle those lies with the truth.
Pray that God will protect their mind from these lies and will give them the wisdom to combat them with the truth. Cover them with scripture that speaks into existence an uncluttered mind that is not confused.
Pray for your spouse to have clarity of thought and focus as they go about their day. That their mind would not be needlessly overwhelmed by stress or anxiety caused by their circumstances.
Pray For Their Concerns
One of my favorite questions I ask Amanda is, “How can I be praying for you?” As her husband, I get the privilege to contend for her with God to see these things come to pass.
This is the ultimate act of compassion: To take on someone else’s struggle or burden as if it were your own. Take time in your prayer life to come to God on your spouse’s behalf, taking on their concerns as if they were your own.
Pray for specific situations and requests. Go to war for your spouse and celebrate once you see movement and victory in any of the areas you are praying for.
Pray Together
The power of combined prayer has helped Amanda and I turn our marriage from one of anxiety and stress into a marriage of peace. This is especially true when our circumstances seem to do nothing but bring stress into our marriage.
Through praying together, you are able to remind your spouse that we are supposed to live from a state of peace. As is says in Philippians, we’re to be anxious about nothing.
“do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.” ~ Philippians 4:6
When you pray with your spouse and make their requests known to God, He is faithful to take all anxiety and stress and replace it with something much better… His peace!
“And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” ~ Philippians 4:7
In our current season, Amanda and I have had the opportunity to pray together for her situation several times. Each time we do it, we can feel a little more peace enter.
Because of this, we now have a new rule: We don’t stress, we pray.
Pray Confidently, Powerfully, And Often
Your prayer life is an amazing tool you have to encourage and support your spouse during hard times. It’s only effective, though, when it’s picked up and used.
My hope is that you would become a prayer warrior for your spouse. That you would regularly contend with God for them and invite Him to work a miracle in their situation. Your prayers have real power and can be a game changer.
Don’t let the greatest weapon available to you go to waste. Pick up prayer readily and use it to cover your spouse during hard times. Be faithful and watch as God brings His peace and power into a situation that may seem overwhelming and impossible.