4 Ways Your Marriage Can Enter The New Year Powerfully
4 Ways Your Marriage Can Enter The New Year Powerfully
By Bradley Bennett
I love this time of year. The craziness of Christmas is over and a fresh crisp new year is ready to emerge. It’s a great time to think back on the past year and dream about the next.
For many, this is a time to make personal resolutions, and those are great when they work! However, I believe that there is more we can do with New Year.
Amanda and I view this season as a time to reload. It’s a time to take practical steps that will strengthen our marriage so that we enter the New Year powerfully.
I’m all for New Year’s resolutions… I’ve made plenty myself! But I believe that stopping with only making resolutions can keep you from experiencing all that this season has to offer your marriage.
Why Focus On Your Marriage This New Year?
It may seem weird to focus on your marriage during the New Year. Often New Year’s resolutions and plans are focused on our individual lives. While these are good to have, it’s also vital that you spend time planning how you will grow together as a marriage.
You see, what you focus on grows. Passively assuming that your marriage will grow and be strong only ensures that neither will actually happen. You have to plan for and work towards a growing marriage. It doesn’t just happen.
This is why the New Year is such an important time to refocus and find ways to set your marriage up to grow. You and your spouse weren’t designed to stay stagnate but to grow together and build a strong marriage where love flows freely and deeply.
This year, I believe God is wanting to do more in your marriage so that He can do more through it. The stronger your marriage is, the more God can use it to change the world around you.
So, what are some ways your marriage can enter the New Year powerfully?
1. Participate In A 21-Day Fast
“And no one pours new wine into old wineskins. Otherwise, the wine will burst the skins, and both the wine and the wineskins will be ruined. No, they pour new wine into new wineskins.” ~Mark 2:22
Fasting is the act of removing certain aspects, or distractions, from your life and freeing up more time to spend with God. There are a few different types of fasts you can do, and I would encourage you to do some research on them before participating in one.
As we can read in Mark 2:22, fasting is a tool that God uses to fill us with “new wine”. Each time Amanda and I have finished a fast we’ve always been filled with more of God’s presence and have walked away with new dreams and desires for the New Year.
Each year Amanda and I participate in a 21-day fast. It’s an amazing way for us to empty ourselves and free up time to seek after what God is wanting to do through our marriage.
There is nothing that will refocus you like a fast and I can not encourage participating in one together enough.
2. Reassess And Realign Your Goals (Or Create Them)
Do you have shared goals for your marriage? If not, then you could be capping a lot of growth from happening in your marriage.
Here are some great areas to focus on if you are just starting to create goals.
If you already have goals, then the New Year is a great time to reassess them, see how you are doing, and realign if you need to.
Abraham Lincoln once said,
“Give me six hours to cut down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the ax.”
By creating or realigning your goals, you are sharpening your ax to cut down the trees in your marriage. Doing this helps you know what to focus on and keeps you united around what you are both wanting to see happen this year.
When realigning your goals, I would encourage you to use the S.M.A.R.T Method. This means creating goals that are:
- S – Specific (Not vague, but clearly stated)
- M – Measurable (How will you know if you achieved your goal?)
- A – Attainable (Something that will stretch you a little, but not impossible)
- R – Relevant (You both agree it will help your marriage)
- T – Time Bound (State when you will have this goal completed)
Using this method will give you goals that will propel your marriage forward with specific steps.
3. Complete A 30-Day Devotional Together
Devotionals are a fantastic way to get on the same page and open up opportunities for important conversations about your marriage. Completing one at the start of the year will put you in a place of unity as you learn and grow together.
There are tons of devotionals that focus on different topics and you can easily find one that will interest both you and your spouse.
The most important aspect of doing a devotional together is the conversations you have while processing through it. That’s where the power and change come from.
Each day find time to talk through what you read and what you both took from it. This will start some great conversations that can have an amazing impact!
Just as a simple recommendation, I love the Two as One devotional from Ryan and Selena Frederick over at Fierce Marriage. Each devotion is fantastic and comes with prepared discussion questions and an area to write out prayers.
4. Plan A “Us” Retreat
The demands of the Holiday season can be enormously taxing. You can spend so much time seeing family and friends that you hardly spend any time with just your spouse. If you are feeling like this, then a “Us” Retreat may be a great way to connect and start the year strong.
Sometimes the best thing you can do is get away. Leave all the hustle and bustle of normal life and retreat to a quiet place with the intention of connecting with your spouse.
Failing to recover from the hectic holiday season can leave you and your spouse entering the New Year disconnected and from a place of weakness, not power.
A “Us” Retreat is a short period of time (usually a weekend) where you pull away and focus on each other. The goal is to reconnect and rejuvenate.
For Amanda and I, this has looked like clearing the schedule of everything and simply staying at the house. We spend the time talking, being with each other, praying, and sometimes going out to dinner.
We love these retreats because we always come out of them feeling brand new. They help us focus on each other, build our friendship, and feel united.
Enter The New Year Powerfully
This New Year season can be one that has an impact on your marriage for years to come. My hope is that you wouldn’t simply sit by and let it pass you by. But that you would partner with your spouse to enter the New Year powerfully.
I believe that God has something great for your marriage this year. He is wanting to grow your relationship so that His love can be shown even more greatly.
What Are Other Ways You Strengthen Your Marriage During The New Year?