Breakthrough: The Spiritual Discipline That Will Transform Your Marriage

Breakthrough: The Spiritual Discipline That Will Transform Your Marriage

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By Bradley Bennett

I was talking to a friend recently about his marriage. Things were okay, but he was feeling frustrated. There were parts of his marriage he wanted to change, but no matter what he and his wife tried, nothing seemed to stick. They were stuck and needed breakthrough.

As he was talking, I couldn’t help but relate. I’ve been in the exact same spot many times!

You see, every marriage is going to have specific things they wish they could change. No marriage is perfect, each one is a union between two imperfect people trying to show each other Christ’s perfect love.

It can be frustrating when your marriage reaches one of these plateaus and it feels like you can’t get past where you are. You may be asking yourself,

“is it even possible for us to experience a breakthrough in these areas of our marriage?

I believe the answer to that question is a resounding, Yes! Your marriage CAN experience a breakthrough. The key to finding it lies in a very specific spiritual discipline called Prayer and Fasting.

Why Do Plateaus Happen In Marriage?

In order for us to get where we are going, we need to take a quick trip to the deep end of the pool. We’ll need to understand some crucial spiritual principles that are playing a big part in your marriage.

The key to experiencing a breakthrough in your marriage lies in understanding why plateaus happen in the first place.

The quick answer is because of sin and our human fallenness. It says in Romans 3:23 that,

“for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God”


That verse includes all of us, none of us are perfect. I’ll be the first to admit that I’m certainly not!

This is important to understand because of something that Jesus points out in John 8:34,

“Jesus replied, “Very truly I tell you, everyone who sins is a slave to sin.”


What Jesus is saying here is that when we sin, we become a slave to those sins and experience bondage in our lives. This bondage can look like specific actions, addictions, mindsets, or beliefs that we hold. Each of these things can cause issues in your marriage.

Even if you are a Christ-follower and have received forgiveness, you still experience bondage from sin. It affects everyone.

This bondage is what causes plateaus in marriage. The plateaus happen when the love within marriage gets capped by the bondage we live with.

I’ve found myself in this place multiple times. I want to love better, but I can’t because of mindsets, addictions, or belief systems I’ve held because of sin in my life.

Less Of Me, More Of God

The reason you haven’t experienced breakthrough yet isn’t a lack of willpower or desire. It’s simply that you are trying to do it in your own strength.

You see, a breakthrough in your marriage actually requires less of you and more of God.

When we try to bring a breakthrough to our marriage through classes, courses, or blogs we are operating in our own strength. Those things are good, but breakthrough only happens when you allow God to free you from the bondage you experience so you can love at new levels.

In Matthew 17, Jesus is approached by a father whose son is experiencing intense bondage from a specific spirit. Jesus heals the man’s son and is later approached by His disciples who asked why they had been unable to help the boy.

As Jesus is helping them understand, he points to a specific spiritual discipline that was required for the breakthrough with the boy, Prayer and Fasting.

How Prayer And Fasting Brings The Solution

So, why Prayer and Fasting? Why is this the spiritual discipline that Jesus points to for experiencing a breakthrough?

It’s because the goal of Prayer and Fasting is to connect us more to God and to deny ourselves.

You see, prayer is the vehicle by which we connect more to God. It’s how we gain more of Him. In prayer, we commune with God in a close relationship, but we also wrestle with Him. We feed our spirit by spending time seeking after God and asking for more of Him.

It’s through prayer that God comes in and begins freeing us from the bondage we experience.

The second part, Fasting, is equally important. The goal of fasting is to deny ourselves and disconnect from our worldly desires. By removing things we depend on, we declare our dependence on God and stop feeding our flesh.

So, if the problem we are experiencing is that we are too connected to our bondage and not connected enough to God, then Prayer and Fasting is the clear answer.

It’s the vehicle through which we disconnect from our flesh and connect more to God.

Prayer And Fasting In Your Marriage

The spiritual discipline of Prayer and Fasting can be a game changer for your marriage. Amanda and I engage in it regularly and each time God has shown up in a big way. It has helped us experience breakthrough in several areas of our marriage. With each breakthrough, the love within our marriage has grown deeper.

I believe it can do the same in your marriage!

If you are feeling stuck with a marriage that’s on a plateau, I encourage you to try a 7-day season of prayer and fasting. Commit to praying each day both together and individually, while also fasting from specific things.

If you are new to fasting, I encourage you to read this wonderful Fasting Guide by Pastor Jentzen Franklin.

Committing to the spiritual discipline of Fasting and Prayer will transform your marriage and help you experience the breakthrough you desire. As you disconnect from worldly things and connect more to God, He will come in and increase your love for each other in marvelous ways!


Have you completed a season of prayer and fasting before? How was the result for you?